Venting Pt. 3

Oh man here we go once again
All the drama, all the rumors, all the losing friends
Somehow people still think I give a fu**
But when they throw there little fits they don't see me duck
Yeah I'm outta the way
You can't do anything to me
Who can you even think to say
That you see straight through me?
Saying things to me like you knew me
I brush my shoulders off and keep doing what I'm doing
You think I need an excuse for being myself?
You think that I'll kneel down for you just cuz you hit me below the belt?
This is not even close to what I've actually felt
People still think that I don't leran from my lessons
That I'll just keep cleaning up my own messes
I think I can learn pretty well when all I get is the same message
Yeah there is still nothing new, but me and the changing years

Brewing my own life beer, cheers
Let's toast to being free from all drama
Well, things change, as told by my momma
I am who I am because of the people I chose to cruise with
So don't be mad at the final product when you helped produce it
Things is that I learned from what I was taught
Express youself and know that people you can trust are not a lot
Keep your enemies close, but your friends closer
That's the way I see it this day and age
Cuz even when you think you know him or know her
People quickly change
So fast, it'll blow past to a point where all you see is there ass
Leaving you behind
Leaving you shook
Someone help me find someone on this Earth I can trust
Help me look....

My Ex-Girl, My Next Girl

In my mind just being there is burning her
On the other hand I feel that I'm deserving her
Cuz every single day I'm earning her
This kind of information is usually personal
But I guess things change, ain't that right?
Hand on the wheel of my inner drive
Feeling everything from her talk to her inner vibe
Just trying to break her down without breaking her inner pride
Just trying to revive after she let my inner die
Just like I tell my friends, why should I even try
When my efforts just bring tears to everyone's eyes
And all that comes out in everyone are lies
Blowin away the unnecesary just trying to make those same tears dry
I just wanna take a minute to fly
But she took my wings
But there's another one next up, let's see what she brings
To the table, burn up my past to a point where it stings
And I'll create the melody of love to a point where you sing


It gets to a point where I'm so confused
There's not much to win, but there's not much to lose
On the other option there is only two to choose
The chance to create another lane to cruise
But I'm stuck in another world
A world of complete irony
My ex-girl, my next girl


Like I said I'm so confused
I mean why should I go to a place where I feel so used?
Why should I take the time to fix something up when I ain't got the tools?
But damn it I hate the fact I was the bearer of bad news
Yeah I adored you to a point where even my dad knew
But who knew?
It just wasn't you
Killed me in every place like we were playin Clue
But there's another one but I have no clue what to do
With her, why should I move on so quickly when somehow I still miss her?
How can I say that I'm over her when I still hate it when people diss her?
Yet I know we ain't for eachother, I don't fit her
And I still don't know where they're both at, at this point
Don't think I should stay in this joint
If only I could steal her thoughts and leave her naked
Someone get me out of this stress jail
Are the risks to high to a pont where I shouldn't take it?
If I do, will I fail?
I don't think there's time for that
But if I let myself be guided by stats
It goes, heartbreak two, Joshua zero
Should I really go back to that?
Or maybe I should just start fresh
Hoping that If I make this next step
She will be for the best
That girl is next

It gets to a point where I'm so confused
There's not much to win, but there's not much to lose
On the other option there is only two to choose
The chance to create another lane to cruise
But I'm stuck in another world
A world of complete irony
My ex-girl, my next girl


Crazy stuff happens in this world of irony
My heart is torn and wrinkled, I'm just waiting for her to iron me
I may interpret this wrong, but she's eyeing me
I'm so lost to a point where only she is finding me
Yes, her the one who's pickin me up
It's funny how she stood next to the girl who months ago was bitchin it up
New people in my life and damn right I'm livin it up
And I give thanks to all the people who watched my heart break
But I give more thanks to the people who helped fix it up
Fed up with living this disorientation
Just know that your the real inspiration
For where I'm at, at this mental station
Just fillin the tank
Do me a favor and just fill in the blanks
So somehow I feel completed
And if you can't, I'm gonna have to ask you to beat it

Venting Pt. 2

Love and live life
Stand straight and in stride
Show what you mean on the inside
Never give yourself the chance to say that you lied
I have no definition even though I'm greatly defined
I am so optimus and I stay in my prime
So even through all the happiness there is always that little window
Opened up to different feelings
Screaming while I see the truth behind what I'm seeing
But this is what I'm really feeling
It's been a month and a half and I don't think it's respectful
To keep my love life uneventful
Can't keep it discreet, my actions are my example
I know it's not all gone
Cuz I notice her face everytime I pass and I'm gone
But in the end it's you who I get along, with
I don't know if you notice but it's pure bliss
But I'm still haunted by her kiss
Even more haunted by her diss
Her words, her actions, her lies
Everytime I hear something like that, regret leaves my eyes
And I wouldn't take back our goodbye's
Even though I gave it a good try
But screw it, relationships are a full line
And the single section is open and free to climb
Put me in your mind so I'm free to find
Give me a sense of your cents
Two nickels ready to make a dime
But peace is what I listen and rhyme so I'll stay still for now
Just to see another heartbreak performance deserving of a bow
I'll give life its chance to prove me wrong
Until that day, I remain strong

The Kid Alone

The kid alone breaths
Yet no one can hear him
The kid alone has a vision
But no one can see him

All alone, yet surrounded by people
Left without a happy ending
He searches for a sequel
Only on himself is he depending

Creating a new world just for him
With all the little things he hides within
He lies empty, his happiness was evicted
Searching for it daily, but the code is encrypted

The kid alone speaks
But nobody hears him
So many people around him
But nobody near him

In a place no man can find
In a paradise meant to unwind
He searches for this date
To cure his heart from this heartbreak

A Vocabulary Understood Only By A Man Who Never Understands

He moves freely yet so captive
He follows his own shadow
He screams : "Damn this!"
He screams and no one hears his cry
Only his heart can endure
Only his heart
Where does he start?
Where does he end?
This feeling extends
Beyond all imagination
A feeling made
Beyond all creation
Make me new and take this away
Make me fall into redemption
Give me the needed affection
I need it now
I yearn and scream for it
It doesn't exist
It's not here
It won't last, not this
No one listens because they are not ready to hear
I scream so loud and clear
But only I understand
Only I
I understand, but I don't know why
I cry
I cry till every tear hits the floor
Pick up my tears, clean the puddle
I scream again and it remains suttle
Scream into my ear so I don't hear my heart
I can't take it
Scream, scream, scream
So I don't hear the voices say
Say the language of regret and pain
Take it all away
Start it over, reset
Do it again, with no regret
I speak in a normal tone
Only I understand, so I stand alone
Stay in my dome
Where no one will enter
No more damage
No more
Show me your past, I'll show you mine
Show me your feelings, what's inside
I do, I did, I cried
I cried and it won't happen again
I only trust that statement
As much as I am forced to trust "friends"
They only drag me down the pavement
I need something to deal this pain with
Show me it
Change me
Make me better
Even though I know you can't
Because only I understand

Love Is...

Love is what you want it to be
Love is a mystery
Love is you, love is me
Love is a door and only we have the key
Love makes us captive and love sets us free

Love is unexpected
Love is reflected
In you and I
Love keeps us connected
Love is restless

Love is inside jokes and time spent together
Love is the warm feeling through any weather
Hate brings nothing
Love just makes it all better
Love is a unwritten letter

Love is hurt, love is pain
Love is always in our brain
Love is bipolar, but somehow maintains
Love is a battlefield
And we carry the stains

Love is great, love is pure
Through anything it can endure
But one thing is for sure
It comes from above
Love is God, God is love

She Doesn't Know

Just a conversation brought so many consequences

Just a couple of lies to be your defences

I made my decision knowing that at some point I would be repenting

And that just hearing your voice would sting and affect me

Everyday I hear another thing I was never told

Damn I never knew you were that cold

Not acting your age

I guess your not that old

A loving girl who does what she means

I guess that's not your mold

I bet your rich from all the lies you've sold

Yet I stay bold

I should have defended my interior like a 2-3 zone

But I guess your plan was always to pick and roll

I gave you all my hands but you stuck to fold

I admit it, she got me low

And the I got sad a little bit more

But that memory is out the door

Because the thing she doesn't know

// I'm still happy

I'm still me

I'll keep my head up

I feel free //

No longer attached to sadness

No longer a product of some madness

My days won't be based on this

My days will be based on bliss

And even though your missed

There are things higher on the list

Than you

Trust me I'll be on the move

Thanks for changing my mood

I continue to grow

// 'Cause she doesn't know //

You have a piece of my heart

I don't have anything cuz I didnt get anything to start

Gave my all

Gave my soul

It just made me fall

And it devoured me whole

One thing's for sure

I lost trust in a lot of things

Specially what love can bring

Pay more attention to the lyrics she says

Instead of the song she'll sing

But moving on

I should stay positive instead of naming things that were done wrong

Things were great, but was it worth it all along?

It still pokes my heart everytime she speaks

Knowing that because of her I shed tears and had my weeps

Because of it all, I had the worst week

Because of my stupidness, I kept on in my sleep

Instead of waking up from that nightmare

The exit was right there

No, it was not fair

But life isn't and neither is love

Trust me the journey was rough

Thank God I screamed enough

That got me sad a couple of days

She got me mad in a couple of ways

Rumors crossed through a couple of grades

It ended and I got to a couple of lows

Days were so sad and so slow

Disspointment was bestowed

But the thing she doesn't know...

// I'm still happy

I'm still me

I'll keep my head up

I feel free //

No longer attached to sadness

No longer a product of some madness

My days won't be based on this

My days will be based on bliss

And even though your missed

There are things higher on the list

Than you

Trust me I'll be on the move

Thanks for changing my mood 

I continue to grow

// 'Cause she doesn't know //

Just as quick as she came

She was gone

As quickly as we exchanged more than names

Sunrise turned to dawn

In the blink of an eye

I was asking why?

What wasn't that I didn't provide?

What was it that I didn't do right?

Questions of the past

Right now, I really don't give a rat's ass

Truth is I wouldn't take anything back

Even though my heart suffered a crack

I met someone who made things clearer

I need to pay attention to the man in the mirror

Just when I thought my surroundings couldn't get weirder

Living in my own enviroment where the tempature is low

Taking everything slow

As I continue to grow

But shhhh she doesn't know....

Venting Pt. 1

This is just a thought
Recovering my heart and mind
Something that was so lost
The past two weeks have been emotional torture
Change was necesessary but I never forced her
But change came one way or another
Felt like I should move on and forget what happened
A change in me that will last to the end
I know that nobody planned it
I lost something that I'll never gain again, a friend
My emotions are no longer flexible and my heart won't bend
I would never take anything back
Everything has a purpose
I'm lost in life's map
Because I know the directions are worthless
People say life's a bitch, then heartbreak's a whore
You never know what's left in store
What's left needs a clean-up but I'm in no mood for a chore
Trust me, this hurts like never before
Feeling like I wasted my time
I know I planted something in your heart and in your mind
But to bad that didn't shine
I'm not trying to be selfish but it sucks to know that you'll be fine
In your words "well whatever"
I know I'll get better
And damn right I'm glad I met her
Babe don't worry about it, you're not the trendsetter
But again whatever
Moving on, I got stuff to do
Looking forward, chillin with my crew
Waiting for something new
Love can wait for now
I'll just keep going around
Knowing what's up so I'll never get down
Keeping a smile so I get no frowns
I keep learning my lessons everyday
Teaching who I can as I may

Have You Ever Felt

Have you ever felt too overwhelmed?

Too much at the same time and nothing is going swell

Have you ever felt insecure?

Like you have a virus and you can't find the cure

Have you ever felt scared?

Coming to terms with the facts that nobody really cares

Have you ever felt like it's all inevitable?

Like you're problem is inpenatrable?

Have you ever felt ignored?

Feeling the need to be adored

Have you ever felt like a liar?

Knowing that the truth is inside her

Have you ever felt you're not in control?

Preparing the pottery but can't get it to mold

Have you ever felt like your efforts are useless?

Just wanting to scream "screw this" !

Have you ever felt like love has two faces?

Like life has two races

And you don't know which to pick

Have you ever felt like life is poking you with a stick?

Have you ever felt missed?

Friends that truly care are rare and can leave in a blink

Have you ever felt like you have wasted time?

Feeling imprisoned like you commited a crime

Have you ever felt so wierd you can't express it?

Like every single problem is worth stressin

Have you ever felt happy to an extreme?

Hoping this will last and that you'll never wake up from this great dream

Have you ever felt like life ain't what it seems?

Getting used to all the little things

Have you ever felt like she's the one?

But you can't see it being done

Have you ever felt so paranoid?

Broken down and destroyed

have you ever felt like you can make it?

So close to the finish line that you can taste it

Have you ever felt like remembering moments?

Living them again till you start crying and moaning

Have you ever felt you didn't take the time you needed?

Instead of taking it slow, you speeded

Have you ever felt unstoppable?

Nothing can hold you back and that's probable

Have you ever felt like giving up?

Feeling like everything you do sucks

Have you ever felt like it's not over?

Like you can do better if you take it slower 

Have you ever felt anxious and desperate?

Like your goals are never met with

Have you ever felt like love is great

Wishing that every single day was another spectacular date

Have you ever felt like God is the one keeping you together?

He is and recognize Him better

Have you ever felt predictable?

Like maybe you need to quit the bull

Have you ever felt tired?

Working endlessly, hoping not to get fired

Have you ever felt like anybody can read your mind?

Like you're wired

Have you ever felt like a good friend?

Good, make sure it lasts till the end

Have you ever felt like writing all your meanings?

Me too and this is what I'm feeling

Painting A Potrait Of My Chest

I thought I needed to add some swag to this
So I blast through this
And rap a bit
Trippin with my friends and laugh a bit
So many presentations have been made
Damn I swear one day you'll clap a bit
I love nagtive comments on my lyrics
Believe it or not, I need haters, but they don't make me sad a bit
I stay moving
I stay grooving
You don't know my true potential
I'm still late blooming
Still fixing myself up
I'm still in grooming
Making room for myself, I stay rooming
Trust me, I know what I'm doing
Love it when certain people say I changed
I ain't different, I just got a lil more strange
I feel so clutch, I think I'ma shoot long range
But at this stage
It's only time to keep progressing
No need to keep on stressing
But I'm not gonna keep cleaning your messes, naw
Clean-up on aisle 2
I'm asleep in the bread aisle like Asher Roth
My hands burn from flame and you'll be the moth
I'm just being silly and going off
Man I'm so sick, I'll I need is to cough


So happy cause things are looking up
Since my chin is pointed north, I know what's up
Life ain't easy, trust me I know it's rough
That's why to so many people, I am tough
I say that speaking true emotion
I truly write just for the notion
It feels so good just to speak your mind
We don't think alike but thoughts can bind
But in the end, only few will understand
The consequences of a masterminded plan
The journey to the center of a man
Who just ran
But who know is so close to the finish
Who knew I would be in this?
My life has lyrics of his own
Who will have the privelege to sing it?
These lines are as close I can get to a re-encarnation
This is my after-school program
This is my recreation
I don't just spill everything
Things go trhough meditation
I just wish my words could pass through generations
And affect all people, of different stations
Will someone identify themselves to who I am in another nation?
I dunno, maybe this is all overwhelming
The matter is in my own hands, I'm the one benching
Play better and maybe they'll get you to stop benchin'
But until things get to how I want them
I'll stay resting


This is just something to get off my chest
The rest is left for less
I needed to lay somethings to rest
I need to make a new nest
Shield on my heart
You can shoot from outside cause I got a 2-3 defense
People still think I'm clueless
They doubt me from the beggining
Outta the gate with weights is the feeling
Even with all that crap, I'm still speeding
People wanna stop my like cops, but no tickets will I be recieving
In myself I'll keep believing
Cause if I don't, who will?
If I don't try to survive, by who will I be killed?
My cup is overflowing, but has not spilled
Cause that's just what they want
For me to explode
You must not know
How much I've grown
Hard as a rock, heavy as a stone
Leave me if you want, I'll never be alone
Call me when you need me, I'll stay on the phone
Get to know me, you can't go wrong
I'm a complex kid, you can get that from the songs
Things just changed from dusk to dawn
I guess things can change in an instant
Close friends become so distant
Cool girls start bitchin'
Friends make you start wishin
That you never met them in the first place
Cause in the end, they don't want you nowhere near first place
But I always got my game face
Cause when the time comes, you gotta be ready
There will be turbuelence so stay steady
Right foot first, I continue my journey


Outta nowhere, I just grew this
Beats in my head got me bouncin like hustler music
I deserve to get through this
This is just how I do this
N to the A to the I to the L
Everybody keeps selling out, trust me I won't sell
Each time I go down, I re-generate like Cell
A few days ago my name was ringing like a bell
I just dwell
In the thoughts, the words of the stupid
They're just clueless
But I can't lose it
I won't move, I won't budge
God is the only one I'll let judge
Thanks to him is why I don't have one grudge
He keeps my calm and myself together
I just get better, contrary to the weather
Rhymes with value like money, lines with a punch like Mayweather
Straight face like a gray letter
Decietful people, I already read em
I'll just let em
Lose their heads
While I make ammends
To hit one-o on a scale from one to ten

Just The Beginning

From start to present
Things have been so different
From start to finish it has been a true blessing
And I'm so glad that you're in it
From how it started is not normal
Talking about ex's and people you like
And we started talking on the phone that very night
You make me think, you make me laugh
You make me think of the future and forget about the past
This all went by so fast
We both want to take it slow now, but will that really last?
Do we both now for sure that we're made for that?
We're both so different, but that's what makes us great
It's both our feet on the clouds, this is our fate
We both didn't know what to do when our feeling came our way
What will the other think or say?
Confession made us free to lighten eachother's day
Followed by so many, we almost feel famous
We both know that God planned and made this
We both needed someone at the same hour
So many people tried to make this sweet feeling feel sour
But we'll continue to let love be our power
In my heart I will keep you maintained
I'm going crazy over you, call me insane
Insecurity kicks in but that comes with the nerves
I'm a hard-headed kid but I know how to learn
Like I learned to keep you in my head
And how I learned to talk to you before I hit the bed
And how to pay attention to the positive instead
So much confidence was gained in such a short period
This could be something so serious
I bet that no one is believing this
Including me
But thanks to God, I'm the one living it
And you're right beside
Ready for whatever, I know you're ready to ride
We have something great in our hands
We will make our own brand
We'll call it The Love Potion
Being with you feels so good
It's like sitting right next to the ocean
In the night, feeling right
Holding our hands so tight
Let our emotions take flight
You know how I feel about you
There isn't even a doubt
You make me wanna shout
To the world
You're my girl
This is my bond
This is my word
A dream that was never planned
This could be something so good, I know it can
And for those who doubt it, we don't really care
We're the ones in the sky and you can't even get there
Truth is, I'm falling and hard
I do it on purpose just so that I can fall into your arms
Inside jokes and issues that we share
A special place in my heart is what you will always bear
This is just what I'm feeling
And I know this is only the beginning...

Man Please...

Feeling so special almost like it's entertaining
Still holding on to my hopes, I'm still maintining
Damn, I feel like going acapella
My mind is so open
If it rains I could use it as an umbrella
I got that saying from a friend who got it from Einstein
For a better life, that's the reason I grind
Hungry hungry hypocrites, that's why I mind
You can't see who you really are, that's why you're blind
I keep my head up and you try to find a reason why
Let's just say that that is something you'll never find
Man please just try to get up on my level
Even with all the shit you got, I still stand up better
Man just try to get my stage 
It's stormy up here, but I got good weather
I stand as a heavyweight while you're still countin ya feathers
Your perception of me keeps changing
Why you trying to save face?
Subtracting til I get what I just need, a difference is what I'm making
You keep up the pace
I'm all up in this place
Slow down bro, this ain't your race
Call me a lawyer cause I'm the person who's defending my case


Something fresh, something new
Something red, something blue
Something for them, something for you
Just when you think you know me, you're left without a clue
Still on my search, still doing me
I keep going up like there's no gravity at an angle of 90 degrees
I keep doing what I do with ease
While you're outta breath, just take a seat
You think you know?
Man please...


Verse 2 and shit just got real
Pen in one hand, in the other one a meal
People thought I was a letter and that they had me sealed
I showed em what I'm really about and saw their faces get peeled
Shocked like they've never seen me before
I'll bless you with good shit, what you gotta sneeze for?
I know you can't keep up, why you wheeze for?
You're fundamentals are lost, what you shooting three's for?
Man keep it down while I keep it going around
Say I ain't got it, you're going crazy for the second round
You're stuck in the bullpen while the starter just took the mound
Sky high limits are my only bounds
Check your grammar kid, you just lost the nouns
You just looking for a flow like mine in the lost and found
Just took a vertical leap like I'm about to go uptown
Man my rhymes explode like landmines
I should get a stand-up cuz you lovin my punch lines
I usually don't repeat this more than one time
But damn I'm one of a kind

Something fresh, something new

Something red, something blue
Something for them, something for you
Just when you think you know me, you're left without a clue
Still on my search, still doing me
I keep going up like there's no gravity at an angle of 90 degrees
I keep doing what I do with ease
While you're outta breath, just take a seat
You think you know?
Man please...


Verse 3 and it just got stupider
This is just beatiful, I mean just look at her
Talking bout my rhymes if you didn't notice
No copy paste, this is all me in case you didn't know this
They say "man you're full of it"no shit!
I used to have a fat obstacle holding me back like Norbit
But now I'm free now, man I worked for this
Still in my zone, I can't stop
Four words: Damn I can rock
Influenced by adrenaline and good hip-hop
Never two-faced, I hate it when people flip-flop
But that just means they haven't matured and ain't rocking
I already fell from the tree and started walking
Trust me man I'll never be speakin about guns cockin
That ain't who I am, ain't what I do
I speak what I feel, I write what I live
My lyrics are based on what really exists
In my life, what the world fails to take a look at
Straight foward
Damn right I'm never turning back
 
 
Something fresh, something new

Something red, something blue
Something for them, something for you
Just when you think you know me, you're left without a clue
Still on my search, still doing me
I keep going up like there's no gravity at an angle of 90 degrees
I keep doing what I do with a ease
While you're outta breath, just take a seat
You think you know?
Man please...

Followed By

I got sixteen problems

About to have seventeen

Those are the years of my life

The grass hasn't always been so green

The world ain't gonna get better as it seems

I slow my role, but here comes the push

I avoid problems while my friends keep smoking kush

Everyone's on center stage while I'm behind the bush

This year of my life has been ruled by the wrong things

Like America's affiliation with Bush

But I push, then comes the fall

I seem to stay bipolar

Yet I feel like I ain't crazy at all

The hits keep coming as I try to crawl

My fundamentals are fading, so I can't start to ball

People keep clownin'me, I'm about to start a brawl

I may be down now but that doesn't mean I'll stay there

Life has many rules, but nobody said it would be fair

But this is not even close to the denoument

Even though it looks like the end

There won't be a way to conclude this

I stay up cause I know the finish line is at sunrise

Damn time flies

What is this followed by?

I'm followed by you, followed by him

Followed by her, followed by them

Followed by life, followed by the inside

Followed by me, followed by my mind

If you wanna follow me, just follow my rhymes

If you wanna follow my life, just follow my lines

Followed by... followed by

Followed by so many memories

From pain to laughter

I'll always remember these

From my friends to my enemies

They all seem to melt like a bed of cheese

All that remains is me

And God who is for eternity

This is all hard to process internely

So much flame lit up inside

It's burning me

But fuck it

Everyone who doubts me can suck it

Bastards who dedicate their lives to doing evil

Just wait till I pull a stunt on em'like Kneivel

My lines be cutting heads off like if I was medievil

On the real

Life's a bitch, just treat her good

Cause she can end you if she could

Shit gets hard like morning wood

I just wish these cats would

But I stay on my grind and take it day by day

Cause in the end

Y'all will judge me anyways

// I'm followed by you, followed by him
Followed by her, followed by them
Followed by life, followed by the inside
Followed by me, followed by my mind
If you wanna follow me, just follow my rhymes
If you wanna follow my life, just follow my lines
Followed by... followed by //

Followed by so much sht from dusk till dawn

Only thing that won't follow me are people who visit the blog

Fuck em' someday the tables will turn

And I will receive what I earned

And someday I'll apply what I already learned

And leave the memories that'll soon be burned

Follow me as I continue my adventure

Truth will come

Honesty from the center

How do you know what life wants outta you if you haven't met her?

No time for immaturities

Your bitch-assness won't be taken easily

I find myself losing you, but I never find you fading me

And I really don't give a shit for a thumbs down you clown

Take a look in the mirror before you begin rating me

This will all be followed by a reaction

I'm screwed up but there's always an attraction

To so many things, not one in specific

Just fall into this

Feel what I feel

Breath what I breath

Continue the journey and you will see

How it really means to be free

// I'm followed by you, followed by him
Followed by her, followed by them
Followed by life, followed by the inside
Followed by me, followed by my mind
If you wanna follow me, just follow my rhymes
If you wanna follow my life, just follow my lines
Followed by... followed by //

Expansion Of My Dreams

Sometimes it's so hard being sincere
I'm not even close to the top, but the view looks good from here
Glories await me while mistakes are in the rear
As cloudy as it is, I can almost see clear
My goals have been set
With no room to get upset
No time for a meltdown
My dreams will never be a letdown
I know why I'm here, but when will I get there?
She's there waiting for meto open the door, but will I enter?
Things are about to get complicated
Good thing I'm patient and used to waiting
But screw patience, I've waited too long
Tired of waiting for my life to sing it's song
If there's a jam in there, I will compose it
I'm tired of sitting here, waiting for a motive
Get what I need, chase what I want
Cheating my life is a plan, but screw getting caught
Life is priceless so don't try to sell yourself
Avoid being bought
Chase what you dream of using what you got
The journey is long and the valleys are wide
Get up, everything is fine
Gotta remember, right or wrong, it's all in my mind
Shoot off like beams
Many doors to be opened, many things are key
Can't stay still
I see the expansion of my dreams

Look up at the stars
I'm will be up there
Spaceships will replace cars
And glory is what I'll wear
My chances are slim, but I don't care
I'm not looking at stats or screens
I'm looking at the expansions of my dreams
( Yeah!) // The expansion of my dreams //

Felt like a little self-motivation is needed
Better self-esteem is everyday pleaded
This is my life and my ambitions are mine to be possesed
I need to put laziness to a final rest
Felt like a little push was to be inserted
Tired of your words being blurted
Put your spells on me
My acomplishements will curse it
Curses! So much to do in my life and it just started
16 years of the same shit, I already know who farted
Life throws curveballs at me, luckily I caught it
People sold me so much shit, luckily I never bought it
I wanna do so much, it's not too late
Not time too waste
Can't wait
Leave it up or make my own fate
Be mediocre or bring myself to be great?
This are questions brought in this mind state
I planted so many options, now it's time to see how they breed
Shoot off like beams
Many doors to be opened, many things are key
Can't stay still
I see the expansion of my dreams


Look up at the stars
I'm will be up there
Spaceships will replace cars
And glory is what I'll wear
My chances are slim, but I don't care
I'm not looking at stats or screens
I'm looking at the expansions of my dreams
( Yeah!) // The expansion of my dreams //

Updated on Sunday · Comment · Like

I Feel So...

I need an outlet so just hear me out
Take five minutes to feel what I feel and what it's all about
I've been feeling so weird
I've lost myself
Not everything is so clear
I'm not sure if it is my mental health
My thoughts take me to a place so far distant
Sometimes good, maybe bad, but I am gifted
How do I know what to give time to think about and what to let go?
What do I rip apart and what do I let sow?
I used to think life went so fast, but now this feels so slow
I stay up, losing sleep
Thinking things that are oh so deep
Feelings that are oh so steep
A sadness that continues to creep
It's so hard to cope with things
It's so hard to adjust to what life brings
I'm only 16 and I've heard life sing
To the light of God is what I cling
But developing situations continue to sting
I just wish this was over
I wish complete happiness was only around the corner
Instead of me and anxiety getting stuck on the border
I consult my mind and give thought to what I live
And came to a conclusion......
I won't know the ending till it comes
And I can finally see the rising sun

/// I feel so ///
// Inexplicable //
I don't understand what my mind commands
But I can't stand one more minute
Of this pain and everyone who has to do with it
Bright spots become so minimal
I feel so inexplicable...

I feel...I don't know
It sucks
I don't know how things flow
I'm so... what the f***
It's impossible for me to express my feelings because I'm afraid I'll get hurt
I lead myself from experience and trust me it works
I gladly will leave you if you plan to take advantage
Try to break my heart again, it will be a difficult task to manage
People follow my problems like if they were fanatics
And a middle finger becomes almost automatic
It comes to a point where you can't stand it
The feeling of being uncomfortable
A mobile heart, leading me to all places, so my emotions stay portable
I will remain straight because it's all I can do
But to my sentimental being I will remain true
I will be on the move like a light beam
And don't worry this is not an issue on self-esteem
This is just a quest to find freedom in my dreams
To wake up in a world where there are different scenes
Some beyond you and me
So I keep it to myself, think what you won't but none of y'all know shit about me

/// I feel so ///
// Inexplicable //
I don't understand what my mind commands
But I can't stand one more minute
Of this pain and everyone who has to do with it
Bright spots become so minimal
I feel so inexplicable...

A Journey To The Center Of My Being

I speak what I feel, I feel what I write
I write what I think, so it all comes from inside
In between your eyelids, I fly this
Something no one else can have, no way to buy this
Results may vary, so don't try this
Rumors don't hurt cause like I said before " It's All Gossip"
And all I hear is nonsense
Why would I even respond this?
Or even think for a reply
I don't give my time to lies
So, as I continue my journey to the center of my being
I get stuck in a place where I even stop breathing
But I can't get the courage to begin leaving
I've come too far, it's been too long
I can't give up, that would be wrong
I look deep inside of myself and manage to recieve
A blessing from a place I cannot see
It's all imagination but the mind can be dangerous
A situation let off the leash, I didn't train this
I'm left with two options, look back or move foward
I follow neither
Because both will leave me with a new bother for tomorrow
And I promised myself there will be no more sorrow
So I stay put and a night comes where it all comes together
The pain, the waiting, it all got better
But what there is still much to follow....

A new beginning processed and retreiving
A new perspective, a new way of seeing
Free to begin breathing
Once more I begin the journey to the center of my being

Here we go again, the journey is long
Do not disturb, I am so far gone
Not meant to steal a title from Drake
But I'm searching with such a lust for life
Have you ever wondered why I love to be alone and secure?
There's times where you can't trust anyone to even sit with you
These times are rough as stone
It's almost as if I can only trust myself and God
Which is why I like to be alone
I search myself and forget about my problems and issues
So many times I have been used
I guess this is just an after-affect
We'll see how it ends after this
If it ends in happy bliss
Or will I again miss...
Positive fights against negative on a daily basis
This is Joshua Vazquez 101, these are just the basics
There is so much more than meets your pupil
I'm on a mission to be super duper
But I continue to slip like bloopers
I get up and walk towards my goal
Until I fill this gap, this hole
Emotions continue to be stored
My face says I'm bored, my words say so much more
I learn from mistakes, but I stick myself in a bubble
Fear is produced from the thought of it repeating itself
This is all mental
But I can't ignore it, it is so sentimental
I know and believe everything in life has a purpose
But almost every person who enters my life tries to destroy it
So at the end of it all they are worthless
I know I'm worth this
That's why I keep on searching...

A new beginning processed and retreiving
A new perspective, a new way of seeing
Free to begin breathing
Once more I begin the journey to the center of my being

I learned a while back that not everyone has the same vision
Not everyone is prone to bitchin'
Not everybody is meant to be wishing
Words are meant to be handeled wisely
That's why I know God is why
I'm still alive
I've been through so many things
I've been saved so many times
I need an outlet
That's why I write so many rhymes
Which is why I take the time to sleep in my mind
This is where I find
Such a stress, I need a place to unwind
I don't care what people think about me for one simple fact
They don't know crap
Led by their own opinion, they keep believing
How can you think you know me when I don't even know me completely?
This is why I continue this journey
So one day, I will recognize myself entirely
And erase everyone and everything that is tiring me

// A new beginning processed and retreiving
A new perspective, a new way of seeing
Free to begin breathing
Once more I begin the journey to the center of my being //

Bipolar

The skies speak of beauty in a blue language
Every problem I have seems so easy to manage
It seems like I just planned it
So high in hapiness and I don't plan on landing
All my efforts are withstanding
All by themselves
It feeels like christmas in july
All I need are the bells
So many wishes thrown into the well
How come I feel so good?
Even I can't tell
But everything's going pretty swell
Working my way through life
I go fast at speeds beyond 95
Running my world like a 9-5
Thinkinng about finding a pre-wife
But that's just mental
As long as she doesn't screw me over with her pre-menstrual
The day went so Gee Double Oh Dee
It's about 11:15
So I'll just go to sleep
As I lay my head on the pillow and reflect
Sadness creeps behind and takes away the effects
I go to sleep empty and vexed
Awww man what's next? ....

What is it that I deal with?
Is this what the world brings?
I speak and act
I do me and lay back
I do everything so smoothly but it ends up wack
I just try to go based on facts
Tired of the way you act
I go up and down
My life takes turns all around
This consumes and burns
Will this be my world?


I wake up and feel my shade
With a smile on my face, but somehow, full of rage
Emotions have no age
I'm sixteen and look what it made
An over-thinking guy stressed like I'm 48
I try to contain
I try to block my brain
But in class I can't even concentrate
I give what I can and left with nothing to take
So even more stress is what it creates
Nobody knows what I have to go through on a daily basis
God and experience is all I have to face this
I just wanna know what made this
Too much on my brain
3 seconds away from clinically insane
Still searching for a dane
Who won't leave me in need of a band-aid
As I return from a long day
I go to sleep early, wishing for this to go away
Praying this won't keep til' may
Great, I'm in a bipolar state

What is it that I deal with?
Is this what the world brings?
I speak and act
I do me and lay back
I do everything so smoothly but it ends up wack
I just try to go based on facts
Tired of the way you act
I go up and down
My life takes turns all around
This consumes and burns
// Will this be my world? //

I feel so alive!
I feel great inside
Misery strikes and thsi is what I find
Mystery equals life
So many stops on this tour
Every emotions causes a detour
Is love the cure?
What caused it in the end?
Was it the heartbreak?
The family battles or was it the fake friends?
I stay in need of a push...a motor
I hate feeling so bipolar....

What is it that I deal with?
Is this what the world brings?
I speak and act
I do me and lay back
I do everything so smoothly but it ends up wack
I just try to go based on facts
Tired of the way you act
I go up and down
My life takes turns all around
This consumes and burns
Will this be my world?

One More Shot- Una Ultima Oportunidad (Feat. Franchise)

Buscando la manera de pasar un buen rato,
call my homies a salir a algun sitio que sea bueno y barato.
Buscando la manera de poder ver la realidad,
de que aunque las cosas anden mal hay horizonte en el mar.
Finguendo que en mi dia a dia no es necesario su llamada,
pero la realidad es que muero por ver su cara.
Aun me siguo preguntando, que hara en este momento,
tendra a alguien q la ame o alguien para pasar el rato?
Vivir bajo la fantasia ya lo he descartado,
para que vivir pensando que aun estoy en el pasado.
Siempre pienso que de alguna manera puedo seguir.
como en cada mala situacion para mi,
de alguna forma siempre logro sobrevivir.
Pero me ha costado, en mi mente has bagado,
por mas que te niege no puedo hecharte a un lado.
Con tantos buenos recuerdos,
y tantas buenas memorias,
para mi es algo dificil hacerte parte de la historia......


De tan solo con mirarla a mis ojos brinda placer,
y me pesa el pensar de que la tuve que perder.
Me rindo esperando de algo mas ella me pueda dar,
vivo con la esperanza de esa ultima oportunidad.
(Franchise)


Damn babe, why'd you leave?
We're perfect for each other can't you see?
Ok, maybe not perfect, but we fit, just ask your mother
I charmed over everyone even your brother
We are and will always be the same lovers
We were in Zion while they were in the Matrix
Lost in the numbers
I can't keep acting like you're not what I need
I just need you to believe
It's a lot to ask, but what you have I need you to leave
Even your man
I won't go down without a fight
Just give me the chance to get it right
I know you have everything you sought
But he isn't the one for you
I can tell he's not
I can tell I'm what you want
How I affect you every time I start to taunt
And even when I stop
I know what I did was wrong
That what I did made your heart long
For something better
That's why I wrote this song
To see if one day we can get along
And return to our world
I need to have the privilege to say
" That's my girl"
Baby I know you can
Leave what you got and come home to your man
No one will ever matchup
I'm still your #1 fan
Call me your Stan
But no more craziness
No more laziness
I know how lonely it feels now
I'm tasting this
That's why I'm making this
But you were my favorite flavor of candy
So sweet like Mandy
Come back to your dude
I need back my boo


There she goes
She shine between all these hoes
From her hair to her clothes
I let you go, but I need you back
I never cut any slack
I'll put this as my goal, as my task
I need one more shot
Just to prove who I am and who he's not
////Just give me one more shot////
(N.A.I.L)

A Verse Dedicated To Someone Who Can't Read It III (The Final)

How did this happen so fast?
Everything we could have been is now in the past
All the times we had...such a blast
Every time we cried, every time we laughed
Like a short breeze, it just passed
Now I think about what might have been our future
Thinking if I would have won or turned out a loser?
Why did God have to choose her?
Why not someone I could be happy with for a long time?
Instead of composing these verses rhyme by rhyme
But this is my final dedication
A goodbye note sent from wherever will be my final destination
This is composed by what I make as private information
From a light-hearted station
A process that was meant for a beautiful creation
Now it will remain slayed
Our vision will be limited and that's how it'll stay
At least for now
I wish to have it all over and for that I pray
I have to admit that my emotions did fade
But out of my mind you never escaped
I'm sorry that it had to end up this way
But life's a female dog
And it sucks that we tried for so long
And it sucks after all the songs
But everything comes out when the light switch is on
Another verse extended to your being
Since this is all I have because you is someone I won't be seeing
But love is something I will keep believing
And trust me that your affection I will still be feeling
I'll smile every time you'll pop into my head
And get sad, knowing that I have to look ahead
But that's all in a lifetime's work
And for what it's worth
I care so much about you
And I'll never forget
On that you can bet...

Circumstances

Love seems so little and circumstances so big
Stuck in a hole that was never meant to dig
The irony of situations is huge, go fig'
But there is no room for sarcasm in what I go through
This is so serious like bad news
Cause you and I never got to be two
And a fairytale lie never had a chance to be true
This situation kept getting old and nothing ever came to be new
I tried so hard but now there's nothing left to do
I'm still confused
Like a dumb blond, ain't got no clue
My heart hurts, the red is turning blue
Decisions weren't made by us, life had to choose
Now because of its choose, we just gotta move
Act like winners, even though we both lose
But better off lost than having somebody else give you directions
I still have goals, still got objectives
Even though we won't see each other, I swear we'll stay connected
Even though everyone involved in some way is affected
Some okay, some worse, some just plain bad
But I won't forget all the moments we had


Friends, foes
Who cares, who knows?
Started so up, ended so low
I try not to pay it attention anymore
I'm just waiting to see what's in store
A shopping bag in hand but I won't let my heart be on sale again
Time to choose who is who
Who is a person I know and who's my true friend
So many people made of rubber
Just meant to bend
I can't believe it got this far, that's not cool
Keeping myself from crying in the first hour of school
I'm outta the shed, no longer will I be a tool
F..k anyone who still thinks I'm a fool
I'm not the one who's wearing masks dude!
So long I have held my words
Looking at my families lives and worlds
As there emotions crumble
No longer will I let them get hurt
No more smiling at hypocrites, not even a smirk
Just keep to your lurk
While I keep to my work

I just wanna scream
I just wanna leave
I just wanna be, I just wanna be
I just wanna be free
Free from this and may it not happen again
I'll try to keep my head up and make advances
Because these are just circumstances...

Deceptively Smart

She said " if someone isn't used, that person is useless"
Fighting to make his point, he can't lose this
But somehow she made him look like a dufus
As confusing as can be, she rolls along
She keeps signing her song
While he's brainwashed singing along
A hypnotic language only understood by those who can decipher
But those who can't get brain burnt with her lighter
She gets what she wants and receives what she needs
She looks at who she taunts
And believes less than half of what she sees
So many people listen to her advice
Thinking that she is oh so wise
Not knowing that all she breathes are lies
And her inside is constructed of plagues of flies
She loses some of them but always remembers
To try to bug him out from January to December
He holds her off and tries to get better
But her voice stays in his inbox like a letter
She shreds him up like cheddar
He falls back until he has to fight her once more
Hoping that one day she will stop blocking his north

A fancy lecture
A subliminal message given
She makes a space in his mind but doesn't let her sit in
So many hypnotized by her lies
It has no end, only had a start
Makes you feel like a retard
She is so deceptively smart

He shakes her off and heads another direction
But her image plays in repeat in his mind
He damns her affection
He has passed through this already, he learned his lesson
He stops to recover his mind
He is in great confusion
Not knowing that he is stuck in an illusion
Past dreams and present memories created a fusion
He hears voices screaming loser
Why didn't you choose her?
But those voices were as lost as him
Addicted to her verdicts like an awful sin
He thinks of a way to receive a win-win
But all in his mind is her, she is now within
Unfortunately his is canned in
Aluminum emotions like a tin
He pinches himself hoping that it's all a nightmare
Luckily he wakes up from it with a blank stare
Grateful that its all over
He thought to himself " this was worse than a bad quota"
Not knowing that he was in a 5 month coma
He looks to he left and witnesses his nightmare in motion
There she was with a stinging presence like a deadly potion
She notices he is awake and runs to him filled with happiness
He starts crying and becomes vexed
For haunting him still, was his ex....

It's All Gossip

I hear everybody speak
But I can only decipher correctly when it's about me
Paranoia kicks in with heavy breathing
Every last word downloads into my head and begins seeding
It seems like every step I take is wrong
Like if someone who's holding my legs all day long
I progress, but exhaustion is strong
I feel like I'm in everyone's mouth for the wrong reasons
Don't talk without knowing
Don't give testimony without seeing
You think everything you hear is true?
You need to pick what you're believing
You're munchin on the wrong food so watch what you're feeding
If you don't know me well, don't speak your mind
I'm already unpredictable already, so in other words you're blind
Don't be so lame
You're so far back that you're still giving high fives
You're the one cutting your tongue with words sharper than knives
Don't talk about someone when you're not the one living their lives
Funny how you talk like it's your time
But you acting without even knowing the lines


Words with no meaning, words in vane
People jumping to conclusions, they must be insane
They think they know the painting when they're not even in the frame
Then don't ask yourself why your alone with no friends
Because your words have no end
No way to stop it
So much crap, but it's all gossip
It's all gossip...


You think you know, but you have no idea
Funny how it applies, couldn't be realer
Keep giving info on something you don't know
You're like a sober drug dealer
You hear everything that is told, your ears are bigger than Ben Stiller's
Your mouth stinks and it only gets fouler
I'm sick of your high-pitched words Mrs. Fowler!!!
Your nose is getting bigger than Ryan Howard's
My ears hurt so I can't pretend like it doesn't affect me
I try to sort the rumor out, but nobody lets me
So I take it step by step steadily
While your mouth creates an awful medley
I'll be happy to let you know
I'm still your friend, but you make me look like a foe
I'll let your gossip melt like snow
But your tongue will keep rollin
So I guess it'll keep snowing
But it's all good
Because every time you talk about me, my reputation keeps growing
And it will continue until you stop it
But anyways...what the heck? It's all gossip...


Words with no meaning, words in vane
People jumping to conclusions, they must be insane
They think they know the painting when they're not even in the frame
Then don't ask yourself why your alone with no friends
Because your words have no end
No way to stop it
So much crap, but it's all gossip
It's all gossip...

Confession

Thoughts succeed, words fail
A newborn inspiration sets sail
More thoughts on my rear like a tail
New perspective, new letter, new mail
A letter with no name
A star with no fame
A guilt with no one to blame
No comparison, nothing is the same
Picking at this stuffed being like a toy crane
Still so much to gain
Truth be told, because lies are cold
I'm scared of what I might lose
I'm scared that I won't no what to choose
I'm scared that there won't be good news
I need to stay strong in faith to red out the blue
To stop talking and do
One man, one boo
Hoping that this ends soon
For the Son to create a new moon


So tired, so tired
Starts so hot, just to end mild
Growing up, just to stay a child
Feeling like I'm in an X-file
Just not normal
Not fitting for the ocassion, I stay semi-formal
Always calling is inspiration
I see it everywhere, it's like a eternal mind station
Something so special, but not playful
Starting so close, just to be unfaithful
My mind plays tricks on me, but I know that that's not what it's made for
Wet papers in my notebook as to simbolize thoughts washed away
As to say : "Say what you mean to say"
But like red to black, the notes just fade
The notes just fade...


I admit because I know it's real
I admit because it's what I feel
I admit to tear off the seal
Just to free my heart and breath
Once again, just breath......

Spanglish Love ( Ft. Franchise )

Preciosa, probablemente no entiendas
pero esta sensacion me atormenta.
Creo sentir que el amor nos acorrala,
y entre nuestras vidas vaga...
una quimica anormal,
que me hace ver que el amor es real.
Que el amor no se limita,
que no discrimina entre negros y blanquitas.
Al contrario eso es lo que desata,
amor no importando las diferentes razas.
Culturas, idiomas...
no seran de problema.
Lo que sentimos uno al otro nos cambiara el sistema.
Se que no entiendes
pero el amor es el traductor,
para decirte que me vuelve loco tu olor.
Asi que se*orita dejese llevar,
digame que accepta
y dese prisa que la noche ya se acerca....
(Franchise!!!!!!!)

Oh my pretty latina
My beautiful Karina
Oh how much I really fell ya
Just tell me how to chill ya
Down, and let me put you in a pretty white gown
But first let me take you around town
Do you even understand a word I say?
If you only understood that I ain't here to play
In this situation, I'm challenged to everything, call it EA
Man I can't stand this, if only you didn't speak spanish
I don't get it...are you tellin me to can it?
Well I'm not gonna can it
Until you understand it
And I'm not gonna finish
Until I win this
I'm off to the store to get you " The Idiot's Guide To English"
(N.A.I.L)